![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
un: WHEATLEY - voice
[Hello new friends it’s WHEATLEY TIME. Do you know what that is? No? You are about to find out. If you haven’t met Wheatley, perhaps this cheerful British voice is new to you. If you have, well. Hello. It’s the metal soccer ball guy.]
GREETINGS, hello, hi, this is a—this is a PSA, that is, public service announcement, for those of you not—not in the know. That’s what it means. An announcement that is of service to the public, i.e., you.
It’s come to my attention that most of you are human, and possibly have only ever met other humans! Which is—that’s fine, there’s nothing wrong with that. You are fairly populous, after all, even inter-dimensionally, it seems, but in discovering this, I’ve realized that most of you are not accustomed to anything or, uh, anyone who is not. Not human. Or organic, even. Like me!
So I’m sure you’re wondering, if you, ah. If we haven’t met. [He lowers his voice—this is his impression of everyone else, apparently.] Wheatley, what are you? You’re just a little…a little metal football guy, how are you talking and moving, and thinking for yourself, and telling me not to touch you? Doesn’t make any sense to me, and, additionally, d’you mind if I give you a kick? A little shake, to see what’s going on? There can’t possibly be anyone alive in there, I only recognize sapience in fellow humans, or human-shaped individuals, and maybe also dogs.
[That’s you. That’s what you sound like.]
Unfortunately, those sorts of questions and, uh, actions are—are insensitive. How would you like it, if I came up to you, and picked you up and shook you about before even saying hello? You wouldn’t like it, is what I’d imagine. But that’s—that’s okay! I understand not all of you are familiar with robots, or artificial intelligence, especially not one as advanced as I am. Only natural.
Just thought I should clear it up, then. I do—I am, perhaps, not dissimilar to one of your human footballs, at least aesthetically, I suppose, but that doesn’t mean you can treat me like one. I’m a passenger here, same as the rest of you, so I’d greatly appreciate it if I didn’t have to worry about any…bodily harm. In my future, because someone thought it might be funny to knock me around.
[Cough.]
Anyway, I think that's everything. Happy to stick around, answer questions, provided they're not rude. Good to meet everyone, glad to be on this journey with you, etcetera.
GREETINGS, hello, hi, this is a—this is a PSA, that is, public service announcement, for those of you not—not in the know. That’s what it means. An announcement that is of service to the public, i.e., you.
It’s come to my attention that most of you are human, and possibly have only ever met other humans! Which is—that’s fine, there’s nothing wrong with that. You are fairly populous, after all, even inter-dimensionally, it seems, but in discovering this, I’ve realized that most of you are not accustomed to anything or, uh, anyone who is not. Not human. Or organic, even. Like me!
So I’m sure you’re wondering, if you, ah. If we haven’t met. [He lowers his voice—this is his impression of everyone else, apparently.] Wheatley, what are you? You’re just a little…a little metal football guy, how are you talking and moving, and thinking for yourself, and telling me not to touch you? Doesn’t make any sense to me, and, additionally, d’you mind if I give you a kick? A little shake, to see what’s going on? There can’t possibly be anyone alive in there, I only recognize sapience in fellow humans, or human-shaped individuals, and maybe also dogs.
[That’s you. That’s what you sound like.]
Unfortunately, those sorts of questions and, uh, actions are—are insensitive. How would you like it, if I came up to you, and picked you up and shook you about before even saying hello? You wouldn’t like it, is what I’d imagine. But that’s—that’s okay! I understand not all of you are familiar with robots, or artificial intelligence, especially not one as advanced as I am. Only natural.
Just thought I should clear it up, then. I do—I am, perhaps, not dissimilar to one of your human footballs, at least aesthetically, I suppose, but that doesn’t mean you can treat me like one. I’m a passenger here, same as the rest of you, so I’d greatly appreciate it if I didn’t have to worry about any…bodily harm. In my future, because someone thought it might be funny to knock me around.
[Cough.]
Anyway, I think that's everything. Happy to stick around, answer questions, provided they're not rude. Good to meet everyone, glad to be on this journey with you, etcetera.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
look just forget it
in the unlikely event that all the components of the portal gun and equipment with which to build one become available it's possible i could help you construct it
but you'd have to promise to take me with you
no subject
Fine it's a promise, but everyone else is coming with us or there's no deal at all.
no subject
1/2
no subject
no subject